Sharp disagreements about sexuality and gender are everywhere these days. As an evolutionary-trained therapist who specializes in gender-specific medicine and men’s health, I have been helping individuals and couples improve their love lives for over fifty years. I recently Dr. Nathan L. Interviewed Lents About his latest book, Sexual Evolution: How 500 Million Years of Sex, Gender, and Orgasm Shape Modern Relationships. I found the book informative, fascinating, and extremely entertaining to read.
When I talk about the biological and evolutionary roots of who we are as men and women I often meet resistance in some circles. Some fear that differences will be used, as they have been in the past, to restrict people’s freedoms and put some people into rigid and immutable boxes. It doesn’t have to be this way, as Dr. Lent so effectively explains.
Joan Roughgarden, professor emeritus of biology at Stanford University and author rainbow of development This is what I had to say about it Sexual Development:
“Many people think they know what science says when it comes to sex. Well, Nathan Lents has news for them. Read this book – it’s fascinating, fascinating and eye-opening, with beautiful ink illustrations that dispel misconceptions about the animal kingdom and our place in it, but most importantly, it clearly shows that nature’s beautiful sexual diversity extends to all living things – especially humans.”
“In just two generations, the sexual landscape has completely changed in much of the developed world, and so it’s no surprise that many people find it all very disturbing,” says Dr. Lent. “What is surprising to me, however, is how little the biology and natural history of sex has been included in the public conversation. I emphasize that this moment of sexual upheaval is actually a rediscovery of the much broader relationship with sex that we once had among our ancestors and that other animals enjoy today.”
I grew up in Southern California and spent countless hours walking in nature. I was a biology major in college and found the world of plants and animals fascinating. As a marriage and family counselor I have found that my understanding of biology and evolution is invaluable in helping support my client’s desire to live a wonderful passionate sex and love life.
In a recent article, “This Truth About Men and Women Will Change Your Perspective on Sex, Love, and Life Forever,” I described the work of my colleague Michael Gurian, who has been reporting on male/female differences in brain function for decades. one in video blogHe shared evidence from more than 40 years of research and a new study that shows brain differences in utero, long before the effects of gender socialization.
If there was one thing Dr. Lent wanted people to learn from reading his book, it’s the value of diversity in the life of all living things.
He said that in the modern world, how we express our sexuality, and how we form our sexual relationships, stems from cultural constructs, not innate biological wiring. Even a cursory glimpse of the sex lives of other animals demolishes the notion that the purpose of sexual activity is to reproduce. Biologists have discovered an ever-growing list of reasons why animals have sex with each other. Animals use sex for bonding, social cohesion, and coalition building. They use sex in a deceptive, competitive and economic way. This is why they have sex We Most do this: just for fun.
Furthermore, in no other species other than humans has sex been so strictly restricted by broader structures like heterosexuality and sexual monogamy, nor was it so restricted for most of the history of our own species. As humans explore this supposedly new sexual territory, we can look to our animal relatives for guidance on how to manage this area of social turmoil.
Understanding our evolutionary diversity will not only help improve our love lives, it may also be the key to our survival. You don’t need to be a trained scientist to recognize that our human species is out of touch with the laws of nature. The scorching hot temperatures we are experiencing around the world are a reminder of the risk we face as humans weaken our relationship with Gaia and all of her diverse life forms.
As Thomas Berry warned us:
“We never knew enough. Nor were we close enough with all our cousins in the great family of Earth. Nor could we hear the various beings of Earth telling our story. However, now is the time for us to listen or die.”
There is still time to listen and learn. If you would like to find out more information about Nathan H. Lents, you can do so here: https://thehumanevolutionblog.com/. He told me that he is interested in hearing from people and that he reads all the emails people send.
If you are interested in my work, please visit me at https://menalive.com/.
